Solar power. Wind farms. Yes, climate change means alternative energy is on the way and I’m sure that’s a good thing for chickens because battery hens will be replaced by solar powered ones, which is good, but it’s going to be a pain on cloudy days because you’ll only be able to watch TV if it’s windy.
News reports keep stating that the planet is in trouble but the planet will be fine, it’s we humans that are in trouble because we’ve been very, very naughty. For a start we’ve put a hole in the ozone-layer and if the hole gets any bigger all the pollution, and all the air mixed with it, will get sucked out into space and then we’ll have to go and live on the moon, which isn’t much fun because it’s a bit like Central Australia, heaps of sand dunes and not a beach in sight. The moon is barren and there’s no Internet up there… just a rubbish dump and a 7-11.
Lightening produces ozone gas so maybe that’s why there are more storms these days because perhaps the planet is trying to heal itself? It’s almost like the planet knows that humans are the cause of it’s failing health and it seems to know that most of the little-parasite-people polluting it are very reliant on water and so live around the coast where rivers flow and all it has to do to get rid of us is get angry, heat-up, flood us out and let the mozzies do the rest. I’m doing as much as I can to help, my car runs on LPG not petrol, I only use natural non polluting soap products and whenever I light the gas cooker with that little blue-spark ignition clicker-thing I obsessively click it 400 times per-gas-jet because I know that lightening produces ozone gas.
They should make a giant 10,000-ton blue spark ignition thingy, as big as the Empire state Building, that runs on wind and solar power, then we could stick it on top of a mountain and fill-up the ozone hole but then we’re still stuck with the pollution. Maybe we’re underestimating ourselves and humans will adapt by evolving lungs that capably breathe pollution. It might get to the stage where there’s no clean air to breathe so we’ll have to walk around wearing necklaces with miniaturised car engines hanging off them with an exhaust hose that attaches to our mouth so we can breathe? Then once we’ve evolved even further we won’t need lung transplants, instead we can simply drop a reconditioned engine in our lung cavity instead.
Whatever is going to happen will happen so don’t get yourself down. In fact hold on because I think it’s already happening. Right, wrong or indifferent, we are meant to be here, we are a part of the planet. The food that grows from the dirt gives us life and makes more sperm and more eggs that makes more people so look on the bright side, when there are way too many people living on the planet you’ll always have someone nearby to complain to.
And it’s not all bad anyway because before my grandfather died, he told me something, which is a lot easier than telling me something after he was dead, he said the next world war would be fought over water so, there you go, if you’re a thirsty young person looking for a good reliable job with plenty of water in difficult times, join the navy.
Cheers, vicplume.com
Tags: australia, change, climate, energy, farms, humans, lightening, navy, ozone, planet, pollution, power, solar, tv, vic plume, water, wind
